The right wing crackpots are at it again. This time they are blaming The Golden Girls for creating a generation of homosexual men out of unsuspecting boys. No, I’m not making this up. Bea Arthur, Betty White, Estelle Geddes and Rue McClanahan were agents of the Homosexual Agenda before gay marriage was even a tinkerbell in Ru Paul’s eye. This according to a simply marvelous article on Christwire.org entitled “The Golden Girls: How One TV Show Turned A Generation Of American Boys Into Homosexuals.” I’m thinking Stephenson Billings, a fine name for a gay porn star, needs to get a life. Here’s a sample from the article:

It was only to be expected that our lonely boys exposed to these conflicted times would succumb to the nagging Golden Girls agenda. These were slender, unathletic children who were left out of the fun militarism of the Reagan years. Skyrocketing divorce rates ruined their faith in traditional relationships. Rock groups like Duran Duran and Styx encouraged big hair and overactive libidos. The show lit a match which enflamed their intense physical urges. With the utmost cruelty and immorality, The Golden Girls seized upon this opportunity to cross the hormonal wires of America’s lost generation.

The results were disastrous. Our horny, lonely boys sought out intimate comforts with likeminded Golden Girls addicts who didn’t mind each other’s theatrical voices and touch-feely hand gestures. Together, these clusters of awkward teens and twentysomethings bonded over their favorite episodes and characters, mimicking the voices and gowns of their tv friends. When the rush of cheesecake and gabfests wore thin, these hairless boys needed a harder thrill. They were so desperate for the next big trend they turned to same-sex sexual experimentation. What woman would have them now, anyway? This led to the worse excesses of early homosexual visibility– the most enormous of drag queens, the dirtiest of leather daddies, the most enticing of twinkie boys, androgyny, overeating, public sex and the birth of “camp.”

OK, Jonathan Turley rightly points to a bit of discussion as to whether Christwire.org is satire. If so, they catch oodles of right wing commenters who just eat this stuff up. And who am I to say Golden Girls isn’t the cause of so much homosexuality? Whether satire or earnest, or some combination thereof by Stephenson Billings, erstwhile antique soda bottle collector, this is a funny article.

FoxNews is seen as the most ideological of all the news networks. This is from the Pew Research Center for People and the Press. But there is some news here. There are actually some people who think FoxNews swings liberal. It’s about the same number of people who give favorable ratings to Sarah Palin. Go figure.

Hat tip to Taegan Goddard.

Rep. Dave Reichart, (R-WAAAAH) has already launched an investigation into AARP, or so he says in an interview with TPM. Reichart announced the attacks on AARP with Mike Pence (R-IN), the Chair of the House Republican Caucus, as seen here in an article from Talking Points Memo. And the GOP itself is targeting the group on the official GOP web site. This looks to be the next stage in the GOP war against healthcare reform. I’m amazed, and so appalled that I have joined AARP this morning.

The last target of the GOP was ACORN, and some aspiring right wing nutcases set up a sting against the organization involving prostitutes. It is unclear what undercover sting will be prepetrated against AARP, but such an action is all but certain with screeching right wing voices like Michelle Malkin on the case. Perhaps there will be a Maalox scandal, or some sort of Viagra angle? Personally, I’m thinking old people in porn will be the ticket to some low level Republicans dreams of making it with Rush Limbaugh and the right wing screechers. Hey, maybe Chuck Grassley will stop whining about how Obama is going to kill grandma when he takes up the attack on the largest organization in the country representing older people. It could happen, but it could also be that Chuck Grassley is comfortable with his cognitive dissonance.

Why would the GOP attack AARP, when they’ve already alienated so many blocs of voters, such as young people, women, African Americans, Latinos, etc.? Perhaps it is AARP’s support of bipartisan solutions that has the GOP all in an uproar. Cooperation just isn’t attractive to the GOP, as they’ve shown for at least the last 20 years.

Stay tuned. This could be good.

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Let’s say that you’re a woman, and you’re a die hard fan of the home team. And let’s further stipulate that you’re not a season ticket holder, and you don’t have hundreds of dollars to buy a pair of tickets for yourself and your spouse, even for the cheap seats at the local stadium. What to do, what to do? How about placing an advertisement on Craig’s List, and hope that a sympathetic person who has a couple of spare tickets will help you out?

So, you’re writing the ad. After all, you’re the assistant director of communications at a local medical facility, and like any good ad copy writer, you know one thing for sure: “sexy” sells, and gets attention (particularly on Craig’s List). You settle on the following, and hit the submit button:

DESPERATE BLONDE NEEDS WS TIX!
Diehard Phillies fan - gorgeous tall buxom blonde - in desperate need of two World Series Tickets. Price negotiable. I’m the creative type! Maybe we can help each other!

Flirtatious? Perhaps. Solicitation? Hardly. But that’s what a vice cop in Bensalem, Pa. apparently thought when he read Susan Finkelstein’s advertisement in the ticket section of Philadelphia Craig’s List. The cop responded to the ad, and set up a meeting with Finkelstein at a local bar. And busted her for prostitution.

Allegedly, Finkelstein crossed some type of arbitrary line, and offered (or implied) that she’d be willing to perform sex acts on the cop and his brother in exchange for two tickets. She was cuffed, booked, and her mug shot is now popping up all over the web.

Several thoughts come to mind, the easiest (and path of least resistance in writing about this story) being that women have been trading sex for favors since, well, about the time that Eve offered Adam an apple. Another thought is that perhaps she was naive in assuming that she could post an ad on Craig’s List, and that an altruistic guy would respond, show up at a bar, chat her up for a bit, and hand over two tickets to a World Series game just because she’s a sexy goddess.

According to the Philadelphia Inquirer story, the vice cop was assigned to a unit that trolls internet forums for “crime”, and the officer “pursued the Craigslist ad to protect minors”. It would seem to be fairly obvious that Finkelstein wasn’t pursuing a 16 year old boy, if indeed she was willing to trade access to her body for access to a super box. With all of the true crime happening in Philly, it’s hard to believe that police would set up a sting operation on Ms. Finkelstein on the assumption that she might be looking to do a Mrs. Robinson on an underage male. But they did.

In any case, let’s hope that police decide to drop the charges. There’s little to be gained in prosecuting case, and most certainly Ms. Finkelstein is not a prostitute. The notoriety she’s gained from the publicity around her actions almost automatically guarantees that she’ll lose her job, and (perhaps most importantly to her) that someone who supports her will come up with two tickets to the game.

Play ball, and let’s be careful out there!

The latest NBC/WSJ poll is in, and in a three way race for popularity between Sarah Palin, the Republican Party and Nancy Pelosi, Sarah Palin wins by a nose over Pelosi. Of course, and it should be noted that Palin was running against a very weak field. Still, this might mean good things for the divine Ms. Sarah in 2012. She’s going to take advantage by becoming the featured speaker at the Iowa Family Council’s annual fundraising dinner, according to The Iowa Republican. Let’s hope for Palin’s sake that she shows for the event.

That’s the problem with Palin at the moment, as delineated by conservative John Fund in the Wall Street Journal in late August:

If so, one of her first priorities will have to be repairing the reputation she is developing as a no-show. Last week, organizers for an Alaska initiative that would require that parents be notified before any child got an abortion reported that Ms. Palin had agreed to appear at their kickoff event but now wouldn’t show. Ms. Palin’s staff insists she wasn’t invited, and that she was out of the state.

Normally, such incidents can be put down to a “she-said, they said” kind of dispute. But the Alaska no-show marked the fourth time in recent months that an anticipated Palin speech had fallen through because her staff insisted she had never confirmed it.

Iowa is a place where the wingnut conservativesw are strong, so Sarah getting her foot in the door there is important. Hey, we can only hope this leads to her getting the Presidential nomination in 2012. She’ll be easy for Obama to beat, after all. Despite him being an active target for hate and trying to put across a controversial healthcare plan, Obama’s favorable numbers are double those of the Quitta from Wasilla.

Hat tip goes to Taegan Goddard.

Taegan Goddard is right, that one of the key turning points in the healthcare reform bill was Joe Wilson’s outburst, showing the nation as it did the GOP as a party of rudeness and “Just Say No.” He may end up responsible for better healthcare for many Americans, though it is still up in the air how many red states, where they need the public option most desperately, actually avoid providing care for their citizens. Is it poetic justice that this healthcare reform bill is likely to serve blue states far more comprehensively than it will red states, with its “opt out” provision? I’d wager it is not all that likely that even red states will opt out en masse, and the prevailing wisdom, at least, shows that Nevada will not opt out. But that’s a minor debate. This is really about the GOP actions of rudeness and ignorance that made healthcare reform possible.

It’s more than just Joe Wilson, though his rudeness in response to Barack Obama’s speech may have coalesced the Democrats wrangling over healthcare reform. (Perhaps the biggest example of hypocrisy is Joe Wilson’s wife coming down with Swine Flu.) But while Joe Wilson may be the poster child for the healthcare reform debate, so much so that I would rename the bill the “Joe Wilson ‘You Lie’ Healthcare Reform Bill,” the GOP should be worried that boorishness and ignorance and even racism is coming to define the GOP brand. It is debatable, after all, whether it was stupidity or racism that led to the posting of racist pictures on the newly revamped GOP web site. Neither conclusion is good for the GOP brand, however.

Examples of teh GOP stupid abound, from Sarah Palin and “death panels” to Michelle Bachman ranting about reeducation camps. These particular instances of whackjobbery get bounced around among the right wing talking heads, but the majority of Americans understand it for what it is — there’s some major stupid going on at the GOP. We’ve got the RNC Chair, Michael Steele, trying to lure African American voters with fried chicken and potato salad, while the real leader of the GOP, Rush Limbaugh, gets punked. Joe Wilson isn’t anything more than a small piece in a trend of rudeness, ignorance and racism, and the GOP, for its own good, needs to recognize that.

I have faith that the GOP will not do that. I guarantee when I post a link to this story on my facebook account I will get a nonsequitor comment that says something like, “Oh yeah, but what about Nancy Pelosi,” a sign that surely there will not be much needed Republican reform anytime soon. That pleases me no end.

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There’s a cat fight going on in the Miss USA operation—and it isn’t pretty.

It began when an openly gay judge asked Miss California, Carrie Prejean, what she thought about same sex marriage. Prejean, a student at San Diego Christian College, said that although she recognizes and accepts that others may believe in same-sex marriage, “I think I believe that marriage should be between a man and a woman.” That created a firestorm of publicity for the Trump-owned organization. A large minority of Americans said they supported Prejean’s opinion. A large minority said she was reciting biased lessons of intolerance; Perez Hilton, the judge who had asked the question, on his blog called Prejean “a dumb bitch.” However, several prominent gay rights activists defended Prejean’s right to her opinion.

Pageant officials had ordered all of its contestants not to mention God on their applications or at any public event. Apparently, openly believing in God could be seen as detrimental to an organization which holds its beauty contest in Las Vegas, also known as Sin City, USA. Prejean’s view about gay marriage, she later said, was based upon her religious beliefs.

Prejean was second in the Miss USA contest itself; her views may have cost her the national crown.

The Miss California organization claimed that since the pageant in April, Prejean missed scheduled events and lied about pre-pageant semi-nude pictures of her, all of which showed her back and only a portion of a breast. A month after Donald Trump had strongly defended Prejean and her right of free speech, he approved the pageant stripping her crown. Prejean, who said the Pageant’s action was retaliation against her views, sued for libel.

In October, the Miss California organization countersued, claiming Prejean owes it $5,200 for what it claims is a loan it made so she could get breast augmentation. In its countersuit, the organizers and officials claimed Prejean “attempts to cast herself as a virtuous young woman and the victim in a supposed conspiracy against her.” The suit also accused her of having a “new-found notoriety [and] an inflated sense of self.” This, of course, is the organization headed by a man who beneath a blonde pompadour enjoys firing reality shows contestants. This is also an organization whose backstage manipulations could make Chicago politics or New York’s Tammany Hall organization appear to be little more than grade school cliques.

The Miss USA pageant claims its contestants are “savvy, goal-oriented and aware.” In a pompous arrogance of self-deceit it even claims that contestants “display those characteristics in their everyday lives, both as individuals, who compete with hope of advancing their careers, personal and humanitarian goals, and as women who seek to improve the lives of others.” The organization, like the Miss America contest, also requires its contestants to be single, never married, never pregnant and, apparently, never nude.

What it doesn’t require is that its contestants have natural beauty or wisdom. There are coaches to train them in voice and poise. There are coaches who train them in what questions will be asked of them, and how to respond in the most circumscribed way possible to avoid showing they have any opinions. There are coaches to tell them what bikini, ball gown, or casual wear looks best on them. There are hair dressers and makeup artists. There are weight coaches and trainers—since pageant officials and their public audience undoubtedly believe that anyone over size 4 is morbidly obese. The contestants go to suntan parlors, and slather lotions and sprays to get an even tan to pretend that they’re sun-drenched gorgeous. They use double-edge sticky tape to keep skimpy clothes from falling from almost-emaciated bodies, as well as to enhance whatever it is that needs enhancing or reducing. They get cosmetic surgery on cheeks, belly buttons, and their breasts, apparently to enhance or modify whatever genetics—or, in the case of the highly religious, whatever God—has given them.

Like any good media celebrity, Carrie Prejean has written . . . or co-written . . . or had someone else write an autobiography. This one will be published in November. The Miss California organization has just assured increased sales by publicly demanding all royalties from the book, because its stable of cookie-cutter perfect beauties can’t say, write, or do anything without its permission, even after they are dumped as employees.

Unfortunately, cosmetic surgery and breast augmentation are something it does approve.

[Walter Brasch's latest books are Sex and the Single Beer Can: Probing the Media and American Culture and Sinking the Ship of State: The Presidency of George W. Bush. Brasch is a syndicated award-winning columnist, author of 16 books, and a university professor of journalism. You may contact him through www.walterbrasch.com]

This is the World Series I was hoping for - and not because I think the Yankees would have been the easier American League team for the Phillies to beat in the fall classic. Actually, quite the opposite. I wanted the Phils to play the Yankees for many reasons. To be the best, to be a team for the ages, you have to beat the team of the ages - and those guys wear Yankee pinstripes. That’s the Phillie’s challenge over the next 10 days.

Don’t get me wrong. Last year’s title for the Phils was wonderful, and wonderfully unexpected. But it was against the Tampa Bay Rays, fer chrissakes. Unsurprisingly, that series received the lowest World Series TV ratings in history. The Yanks - Phils matchup starting on Wednesday evening in the Bronx will be anything but low rated, and anything but boring.

The subplots alone will keep the pundits and sportswriters busy until the first pitch on Wednesday evening. Projected starters CC Sabathia and former Cleveland teammate Cliff Lee are pitching against each other in the first game. The power hitting of Alex Rodriguez and Ryan Howard will make every turnover of the lineups exciting. Jimmy Rollin’s mouth will provide plenty of bulletin board material for the Yanks, and certainly Johnny Damon will reciprocate for the Phillies. But most of all, it’s New York -vs- its poor sister to the south, Philadelphia.

Yes, those of us from the Philadelphia sports market have always had a chip on our collective shoulders when it comes to New York teams. The sport doesn’t matter - football, hockey, basketball, baseball, or inter-mural badminton for that matter - New York teams have, for the most part, owned Philly teams for so long that the entire city is drooling at the prospect of beating one of them for a world title. Any of them.

It’s more than just sports, though. Philadelphians have long held a bitterly painful civic inferiority complex to the Big Apple. Part of that is sports related; most of it is simply a cultural thing. New York is Wall Street money. Philly is a metaphor for blue collar life struggles. Mayor Bloomberg or Mayor Nutter? Come on, it isn’t even close. Hell, even our organized crime rings and local mafia thugs were second rate back in the day. Joey Merlino or the Dapper Don? You make the call.

So this is finally Philly’s shot at civic redemption. Cliff, Cole, Ryan, Chooch - you guys have so much more riding on your shoulders than you can possibly imagine. For the average resident of Philadelphia, this is about so much more than baseball. But win this series, guys, and I guarantee you that none of the players on the 2009 Phillies roster, their wives, kids, grandchildren or great-grandchildren will ever have to buy a cheesesteak or Yards IPA again in this town. Ever.

Yeah, it’s that important.

Play ball!

The world is upso down. FoxNews, in an editorial about the Obama Administration’s disdain for the network, and in as dramatic a style as they could muster, has compared itself to that left wing druggie journalist Hunter S. Thompson, while at the same time comparing the Obama White House to the Nixon White House. A comparison of FoxNews to a druggie? I can go with that, though Thompson certainly had a far higher ethical standard than FoxNews. Perhaps a more apt comparison would be to William Randolph Hearst. Anyway, there’s the end of the FoxNews editorial, where they basically suggest that Barack Obama go boozing with Roger Ailes.

Perhaps it is time for Gibbs and this administration to act like grown ups. Perhaps it is time for Gibbs and this administration to take a different page out of the 1972 campaign playbook. — After being thrown off the Nixon plane, Thompson sat down for a whole bunch of drinks with Nixon speechwriter Pat Buchanan. Thompson was back on the plane.

If Obama can get the prof and the cop together for a beer, he should be adult enough to call a truce and sit down with Fox’s Roger Ailes over a bottle of Jack Daniels.

Of course, the parallel here would be a FoxNews broadcaster sitting down and guzzling Jack Daniels with an Obama speechwriter, but the FoxNews staff is known neither for honesty nor good logical writing.

Speaking of logical writing, check out the gurgling nonsense from Victoria Jackson, pictured here doing a handstand in front of her homemade sign supporting Glenn Beck. Here’s a little taste:

I took my beautiful fake nails out to my car and drove to the car wash. Hard working, friendly Mexicans made it shiny. I don’t know if they were legal or illegal. I love everyone, but I think rules should be followed. Why can’t they be legal? Is it difficult? You’ll probably explain Amnesty to me tomorrow on TV, because you always know what I’m thinking. I did those minimum wage jobs for years, working my way up the Capitalist ladder. I did it with a happy heart looking forward to the day when I could have a great job! But, while Obama romances the racial minorities; defending Professor Gates, picking Sotomayor, having Latin dance parties, and hinting at Amnesty, don’t the minorities realize that if Obama continues to destroy Capitalism they will always be stuck on the bottom rung? There will be no Capitalist ladder.

Glenn Beck, I like your solution, “Replace the corrupt Congress.” Good plan. I’m studying the candidates right now. Jindal is good. Handstands for Huckabee. Palin for President.

Glenn Beck, thank you for 9/12. I went to the Westwood, CA 9/12. See my handmade poster, behind my handstand?

I went to the sign making place today. I designed a Glenn Beck bumper sticker because you don’t sell one on your website. Humility is sexy! It’s so rare these days.

If that new “Diversity Czar,” Mark Lloyd or his evil boss ever try to take away my Fox News, my Hannity, my Radio Shows, or my Glenn Beck, they are in big trouble, because I won’t let you go. I won’t let you go.

Love always,
Victoria Jackson xxoo

P.S. Joy Behar hates you, so you must be doing something right!

This is either a masterful stroke of satire by Jackson, or she is too insane to walk the streets alone. I just can’t figure it out. What’s with that Joy Behar line, after all? It’s like a line one 14 year old girl might use to another. Then again, this is a letter from Victoria Jackson to Glenn Beck, who cries far worse than a 14 year old girl. And check out Jackson’s references to Vietnamese and Mexican-American workers she encounters, references that show little awareness as to how the world might read them. Even Glenn Beck is more aware of his image. Still, is Victoria Jackson engaged in an elaborate satire? You make the call.

How can anyone imagine the press to be supportive of Obama after this piece. First, Reuters writer Thomas Ferraro latches onto comments by Senator Lamar Alexander (R-Nixonian) comparing Barack Obama to his old boss. He warned Barack Obama not to start an enemies list, as Alexander’s old boss Richard Nixon. Is this projection or what? From the Reuters Stenography Service:

A top U.S. Senate Republican invoked the memory of the scandal-marred Nixon administration on Wednesday to urge U.S. President Barack Obama: “Don’t start an enemies list.”

Senator Lamar Alexander told Reuters he sees the Obama White House adopting an attitude similar to that of the Richard Nixon White House four decades ago, that “everybody is against us and we are going to get them.”

Alexander cited as examples the Obama administration threatening to strip the insurance industry of its exemption of federal anti-trust laws, “taking names” of bondholders who opposed the auto bailout, its reported aim to “neuter the U.S. Chamber of Commerce,” boycotting Fox News Network and “calling out” of others who oppose it.

“I’m suggesting to the president that he back up and start over,” said Alexander, a member of the Senate Republican leadership. “Don’t start an enemies list.”

This was followed by the ring of truth tolling from Alexander’s lips. Yeah, right.

“We want to work with you,” Alexander said.

Now some of us have memories. We remember Richard Nixon’s enemies list, and also the ludicrous people who showed up on it. Paul Newman considered his inclusion his greatest accomplishment. He was joined by Barbra Streisand, George Wallace, Bill Cosby, Pioneering heart surgeon Michael DeBakey, Carol Channing, Joe Namath and Gregory Peck. Check out Nixon’s enemies list yourself. But keep in mind that just because a Republican calims something doesn’t mean there’s a ring of truth to it. This warning of Alexander for Obama to avoid building an enemies list has the same ring of truth as might a warning to Obama not to fiddle while Rome burns. It’s bizarre in relation to the truth, and the Reuters article not only has no comment on that, but also interviewed nobody with an opposing point of view. Sloppiness or blatant stroking of the GOP? Or maybe this is incompetence on the part of Reuters writers and editors, an incompetence so similar to Republican incompetence that we might want to bring in Lamar Alexander to warn them.

And now to John McCain. Reuters writer Thomas Ferraro knows his stuff in at least one sense; you can always get a good quote from John McCain, even if that quote is throroughly stupid. Check out the words of John McCain in support of the ludicrous notion that Barack Obama might be constructing an enemies list a la Nixon:

Republican Senator John McCain, later at the Reuters summit, advised Obama to tread carefully in a town where political enemies come with the territory.

“I think I’ve been around this town, in the view of many, too long. But long enough to see what the Greek god Hubris will do to administrations,” said McCain, who lost the 2008 presidential election to Obama.

“And if I were advising the president, which obviously in the administration I’m not, I would encourage them to tread very carefully in making enemies intentionally,” he said. “I’ve found in Washington you pick up enough enemies just conducting your normal life without going out and picking some out.”

My high school Latin teacher Mrs. Ringler is rolling in her grave. The Greek God Hubris? Wha. . .

Did nobody at Reuters, either reporter or editor, ever take history? Wouldn’t you think it’s a requirement to being a reporter, at least if one refers to history in a story? Sure, this guy screwed up on the supposed parallel between Nixon and Obama, but that’s to be expected given that he evidently set out to do a hit piece on Obama, or at the least merely a job of stenography while listening to Republican rants, then reporting them as “news.” But he allowed McCain to get away with fantasy, at best an old man’s memory lapse, and treated it as if it were fact. No, there was no Greek God named “Hubris.” Any reporter who takes John McCain at his word is not doing his job. Or shilling for the GOP.

I leave you with Neil Young. Even Richard Nixon has got soul.